American Sniper, or DAMN Bradley Cooper Looks Good

Ok so I watched American Sniper (but not at the theatres cuz I wasn’t gonna pay for that sh*t LOL) and my initial thoughts were:

1. You can totally meet your future husband if you’re vomiting at a bar. #AmericanDream

2. OH HELLO Bradley Cooper you lookin’ mighty fine though.

3. When Bradley Cooper told his drunk future wife that hicks bang their cousins, I thought OMG so do Afghans- This can begin peace negotiations with the Taliban for sure.

4. That baby he’s cradling looks really fake:

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5. Finally, that Arab sniper was really hot.

And then I thought a couple other things:

1. Hmmm, why do they show the Twin Towers falling and then men getting deployed to Iraq like the two were connected? LOL AHEM 9/11 didn’t have sh*t to do with Iraq.

2. Why does he take his Bible everywhere? Bro Muslims love Jesus too though LMAO.

3. Didn’t al Qaeda in Iraq not exist till after Chris Kyle’s first tour? So he isn’t shooting terrorists initially….

Yea that last point is pretty important. Chris Kyle’s first tour was in March of 2003. In the movie, his military commander says they’re fighting AQI (Al Qaeda in Iraq).

SCCCCCCRRRRRR HOLD UP THOUGH that’s a HUGE lie (SHAME SHAME CLINT EASTWOOD TU-TU-TU). AQI didn’t exist until late 2004. The movie makes it seem like this is who Kyle is shooting. Upon viewing the terrorist attack at the U.S. embassy, Kyle laments to his wife: “Look what they did to us”. Bro. “They”?!! If by “they” you mean al Qaeda, then THEY were not the freaking woman and child you killed. The movie conflates a legitimate indigenous resistance with the people behind 9/11, who anyone with a brain knows now WERE NOT IN IRAQ.

This movie is nothing more than a mechanism of propaganda. Realizing this made Bradley Cooper wayyyyy less hot. How is it even feasible or okay to perpetuate a lie like that??

All the cinematic wonders and appeals to emotion flew out the window the second I registered that this whole movie is one big sh*tstorm of whitewashing. It tries to legitimize the war in Iraq that urbody and they mama knows didn’t have sh*t to do with 9/11. Remember when Bush admitted there WERE NO WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION? Ya. Only weapons of mass DECEPTION apparently. So what DID we accomplish with the invasion?

The US destruction of Iraq left an estimated one million Iraqis dead, 4.5 million displaced, five million orphaned, some two million widowed and birth defects and cancer rates significantly worse than those seen in the aftermath of the atomic bombing of Japan at the end of the Second World War. The US war on Iraq also fueled the rise of ISIS. This immeasurable suffering is completely erased from the narrative presented in American Sniper. – Rania Khalek

 

OKAY so besides the fact that the whole movie glorifies a war that was built on a lie that had nothing to do with 9/11 (sorry about da run-on sentence), it ALSO tries to make Chris Kyle into a remorseful good-hearted Christian with a firm moral grounding.

This is also bullsh*t. He was a sociopath. And he thought this was a religious war which makes him an idiot:

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And of course my favorite:

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Anything and everything that has happened in Iraq since the U.S. invasion is not about war. It’s about resource-control and politics. And if anyone thinks it’s about religion, well congrats, you’re a malleable and naive bimbo.

And since this films release, threats against Arab-Americans and Muslims have dramatically increased, according to the American-Arab Anti-Discrimination Committee. Don’t believe me? Just check out what my fellow Americans are saying on Twitter:

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How cute.

Also something that’s really alarming. I only figured out how Fugazi this movie was because I have a background in Middle Eastern politics and the inquisitiveness to find out the truth. My peers may not have those characteristics. So when people watch this movie, they’re totally gonna buy it. Like, they’ll really think that Chris Kyle was a remorseful, but proud American who fought for our country against those who perpetuated 9/11 and that Iraqis and Arabs/Muslims are nothing more than blood-thirsty Jihadists. This is what scares me the most. The illusion Clint Eastwood has so vividly painted.

My closing thoughts?

Clint Eastwood is really old and should probably kick the bucket soon,

and Bradley Cooper, please go back to The Hangover and stop perpetuating a lie that not only makes my people look way more evil and sadistic than they are, but rewrites the entire narrative of the Iraqi War. KTHNXBAI.

 

14 Comments

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14 Responses to American Sniper, or DAMN Bradley Cooper Looks Good

  1. Hadiss jamal

    Madinah I love you, and this blog is actually really cool

  2. you shouldn’t have watched the movie. It’s for AMERICANS who love our men and women in iniform. Go back to your country of you’re going to bash people(Americans) for loving their country and protecting our freedom.

  3. What’s more, the people (white males) who voted enough for this movie to get an Oscar nom are also the same dumb shits that are critiquing Selma in it’s portrayal of LBJ as fighting against Civil Rights. First off, it is a movie, so you have to always be aware that ‘based on true stories’ means the filmmaker takes as many liberties as they fucking please, accurate or not. Secondly, I didn’t see anyone give two shits as to how accurate Argo was when it won two years ago– like are you really telling me there was a van full of Iranians trying to kill White Savior Afleck as they were getting off the tarmac? Yeah, that totally fucking happened in real life. I’m gonna stop rambling, but I have a lot of feelings about how fudging stories is ok, if White is Right. Fuck your perpetration of my false history.

  4. Shabnam

    This was a great article about the movie and completely agree. Your blog is something, keep it up !

  5. Patriot01

    You’re an idiot….simply put. News flash, this is America, and regardless of your un-American opinion of this movie, Americans….excuse me, patriots want to see the stories of our defenders told. If the film’s portrayal of Muslims offend you and/or if the portrayal of a hero (you know a person who saves American lives) offends you, please consider relocating yourself and anti-American bullshit to a more suiting environment. Furthermore, if you cry that Muslims are stereotyped as all being jihadists, then why do we not see any of the peaceful Muslims speaking out against the brutality exhibited by the Muslim extremists? Why are you not condeming those who are hiding behind your religion to kill people in the name of Allah? Shouldn’t you be standing up for your peaceful religion and using the freedom of speech that guys like Chris Kyle bled for to protect, to make a distinction? Exactly…..so while you’re enjoying your ability to make such ridiculous and ungrateful remarks about a film that the majority of Americans are proud of, be sure to remember that we have that same right to say whatever the hell we feel like saying……As for your blog, I think it’s comical and juvenile. Please seek another country to leech off of where you can feel important because it’s not going to happen here. America is changing….and coddling anti-American idiots is not on the agenda.

    • dinajaan@hotmail.com

      Lmaooo you’re rant is so cute! Thank you for sharing! God bless America!!!!

    • a.fresh

      You’re the the type she’s referring to in her piece, ignorant, clueless, insensitive and brainwashed. News flash: you’re promoting a piece of shit film for piece of shit people.

    • Amir Hotak

      Coming from a man who has been to a war torn country, and not in an armored uniform to prop up a puppet government, you seem to have a problem using rationale and logic. You blindly support the military and the war that is ensuing the Middle East just because the country in which you live in is one of the players involved in an obvious international crime.
      You say to condemn people who kill in the name of their religion, but you support people who kill in the name of their country. It doesn’t seem as though you differ from those warped extremists who kill people based off of a misinterpreted/perverted view of their ideology.

      You basically responded emotionally through an identity response to defend your point of people killing others, and it being considered okay as long as they are from the same patch of land as you are.

      – Amir Hotak, an Afghan raised in Orange County who has seen the aftermath of war in Afghanistan

      P.S. Nobody gave you the deed to this country so kindly insert your uneducated and baseless opinions up your ass.

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